I remember those days when I was in six standards. This is very tender age in all angles and a child is not much grown emotionally at this stage. Same was true for me at that age. I was not very clear about love and sex. I had never experienced love for any girl. All the girls in my class were same for me as boys. There was no restriction on sitting with them. We play with them and some time even touches them also. However never any feeling of love or sex came in my mind.
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Every thing was going smoothly, one day a beautiful English teacher came to our class. She was our new English teacher. This was her first assignment. She had recently passed her masters in English. She was approximately 22-23 years old. Her body is average type. She was a clear example of how a beautiful and adult woman should be. Her every body part is in mature state. This was my first experience of seeing a so beautiful woman. I could clearly see a huge difference between her and the girls of my class.
She started taking our class. I first time in my life had seen some kind of attraction for a girl. A strange feeling started taking over me. Whenever I seen her then I likes to see her even more. Dreams of her started coming in to my mind. I started attending her class and doing work given by her more seriously. I wanted to come in her favorite’s lists. I felt bad when some one talks to her. Day by day my madness for her started growing. I wanted to be remaining more and more with her.
I started dreaming marrying of her. These were my true feeling first time for some one and some kind sexual attraction was also present in it. I had first time realized the difference between a man and woman. I wanted to touch her and sleep with her. I wanted that she should take over all of my responsibilities. She made food for me, wash my cloths and remain with me for ever. These are unknown feelings which had gripped me. I had never encountered them before.
One day came when she gave us a test and told us that she would give surprise gift to the topper. I don’t want to lose this opportunity. I worked very hard for the test and stood first in it. Will announcing the numbers see came near to me and kissed on my face. For some minutes I was in sky. For me this was like winning a big battle. With this my feeling for her becomes stronger. Feeling of her lips on my face was making me mad. I started wanting to kiss her also.
One month before our exams news came that my favorite teacher is going to married this week and see would now never come again to school. I felt like that some one had taken ground away from my feet. My dreams were looked shattered to me. I felt very bad about the guy who was going to marry my teacher. First time a desire to grow early and propose her arises in me. However with the passage of days everything starts coming into normal. Again I became a normal child. But defiantly she was able to teach me the difference between a woman and girl.
www.geocities.com/arvindkatoch1
Friday, February 17, 2006
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